Friday, February 15, 2013

Folders, Stickers, Drama & Gracie.

It was an emotional day...
...for Grace.

I was in the bathroom making an attempted escape.
My latest read was mere pages from completion.
Marie Antoinette was close to death...
Tap...Tap....Tap.
Mommmm?........Where are yooooouuuuuu?
The little voice trailed through the hallway, beyond the closed door.
tap.
tap.
Mommm?.........Is that you in there?.....Can I come in, please?

I could hear the desperation in her voice.
Me: Is everything alright Gracie?
Grace: Not really. Can I talk to you in private?
Me: Sure baby, come on in.

We sat in the bathroom together with the door closed. Clever Grace. She knows that time is one our side in here.

Gracie was teary eyed.
Her lower lip puffed out as she sniffled back the boogies.

What's wrong honey?

That's when the sniffling worsened and my Grace began to pace the room, arms a flutter.

"Mom, I'm nervous."
pause
"I'm scared that I'm going to get in trouble in school and I don't know what I should do."
pause
She looked at me and wiped her tears away from her glasses. 
The glasses came off.---- Uh oh.
More tears.
What could she have done?
My kid was a boogie faced mess and in a bathroom panic?!
---the story unfolds---

GRACE'S TALE

You know my teacher? Well, she has us clean sometimes...you know, our folders and our desks and our papers?...

Me...Yes.

We had to clean our papers and our folders and I don't use the stickers like some kids in my class.I don't like the sticker system. I have my own for my folder.
(stickers?? folders??)
 The other kids put some things in each side of their folders and look for stickers.

(I was confused about the relevance of the stickers but contined to listen.)

I prefer to keep my papers all on one side. I don't look at stickers.(again with the stickers...??)

Me...ok. But why do you care about the stickers?

I don't but other kids do.
(She wiped at her tears and paced...I'm gueesing that the stickers are only part of the BIG issue.)
But Mom, I got confused when my teacher asked us to clean our writing folder and now I'm going to get yelled at.
I'm going to be embarrassed and maybe cry. I don't want Mrs.---- to yell at me. She yells when kids aren't organized. That's what happens in 2nd grade! (pacing...pacing...wringing her hands...Oh MY!)

Me: She what?! She had better not!...But in truth I said: 
Oh really? It can't be that bad baby. I thought that your teacher was nice and very funny?

She is when you are good...not when you are messy or throw things out. That's what I did!! Now I don't know what to do. This is soooo bad. I can't see her. She will yell at me. I have never done anything wrong before. (...and she geniunely hasn't)

Me: Gracie, baby...If you have never done anything wrong than I don't think you have a thing to worry about. Your teacher loves you and knows that you are a great kid. What exactly happened? I don't understand. What you are worried about? Did you lose something?

WORSE.
I got confused.
(Watch out world! I'm waiting for the heaven's to open up and swallow her. -They don't.)

Me: That's ok. Everybody gets confused at times. (really wishing that my kid would get to the point here)

I got confused and didn't look at the stickers because I don't do that and I like my things together in one pile and I didn't listen ALL THE WAY and I threw paper out that I should have kept. Now my teacher is going to get loud and yell at me. What am I going to do? I HAVE NEVER GOTTEN IN TROUBLE BEFORE. THIS IS BAD. I am nervous. Can I not go to school tomorrow?(-more tears and an oh-so-pitiful look. My poor little type "A".)

Me: No...you'll be fine baby. You just need to explain this to Mrs.----. It's not that bad. REALLY>>This can be fixed.

Grace was now bawling.

You don't understand. My teacher was not born to yell like Italian people...(we have Italian neighbors, what can I say?) - but she yells when kids don't listen. 

Trying to hide my smile I responded,"What kind of papers are missing?"

Almost all of them. Those custodians are very fast! (HUH?!) I rescued 2 from the garbage (Oh no.)but I couldn't find the rest. Mr.---- says that the custodians clean everything, even the floors! I think they snuck in and cleaned when I ate lunch!
WAIT.
BACKTRACK.
DID YOU SAY THAT YOU WENT THROUGH THE GARBAGE GRACIE?

Yes.

Me: Weren't there boogies and icky things in there?

No. Not yet. I am usually the first person to get organized. I am faster than the other kids so it was clean garbage. I looked. Only papers. No boogies. And I washed my hands with soap after. (This was said proudly with a puffed out chest. -Hooray for clean garbage?!)

Me: (wanting to laugh because my little girl had on such a straight face and was very animated) Ok..then. I'm glad that you checked first. Please don't go in the garbage again though...ok? It's kinda gross honey and you should really just tell the teacher next time.
Grace looked at me as if I had 5 heads and was speaking jibberish.
Obviously I didn't understand where she was coming from.  

Jim: (from the kitchen) Did I hear that Gracie dug through garbage?!

Yes Daaaddd! I was looking for very important papers and don't worry I checked for boogies first and I washed my hands.

Jim: (now at the bathroom door and peering in and smirking)Don't do that again. Gross. Ewwww...

Dad, you don't understand. This very serious and I could be in big trouble. The biggest trouble ever! (More tears and boogies)
Me: (wink...wink...off to the side in his direction) YES DADDY...VERY SERIOUS. Gracie can explain it all to you. Maybe you can help. I tried to explain that it would all be alright (hint...hint) and that the teacher is very nice (hint...hint) and that Gracie shouldn't worry (hint...hint).

Please get the hints.

- After listening to our Grace's tale Jim said:

Jim: I don't know Grace. Sounds like you're in big trouble.

Grace: See!!! I told you!! (staring at me and then running out of the room.)

OH JIM>>>YOU HAD TO DROP THE BALL>
YOU HAD TO TRY AND BE FUNNY>>
...When will you "get" girls?
...especially the stressed out ones?

Me: Gracie.....Daddy is just trying to be funny even though he isn't. Do you remember when I told you that Daddy is just a BIG BOY, kinda like the ones in school? (Please God let this work.) Well, Daddy didn't mean to scare you. He's just super silly like all the other boys.

Grace: That's not funny at all. What's wrong with boys?
Me: I don't know. Just try not to take Dad so seriously. 

CRISIS AVERTED...DAD WAS A CASUALTY OF THE WAR ON STICKERS AND FOLDERS.

The next morning Grace woke before her sisters.
Nudge. Nudge.
Mooooommmmmm... Remember our talk yesterday?
I nodded...yes.
Well, what can you do about it? can you call my teacher and let her know that I didn't mean it and I'll be more careful and to please, please not raise her voice? I'm so scared. I'm really, really scared.
Here we go again.

The hour dragged. I assured and reassured. Her sisters did the same. 
Nothing helped.
Until I promised to call Mrs.----.
I held my cell phone in hand as the girls hopped out of the car.
I smiled and waved it high in the air for Gracie to see.
She smiled back and walked across the bus path, holding hands with her sisters.

AHHHHhhhhhh. BEAUTIFUL.
-Time to push aside the Kodak moment and speed dial!

 I assured her that I didn't feel that there was a problem. I was calling to put Grace's mind as ease. Grace was terrified. 
I mentioned the key words in my sentence...Grace cleaned her FOLDER  and didn't pay attention to the STICKERS...
SAY NO MORE. I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED. IT HAPPENS A LOT...IT'S NO BIG DEAL. I'll soothe poor Grace's.

YES!!!!! Thank the Lord!! 

We laughed and mumbled something about "the eye of the beholder" and "talk about perspective." yada yada yada.
Thank you thank you thank you.
Bye now. 
Done.

Time to make it to work....in--- AHHHHH! 3 minutes!!!

---Thankfully my school is across the street from theirs.



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